Things that piss me off
Monday, February 18
-Lupe Fiasco
-Dwight Howard 's "dunk" aka his "throw the ball really hard into the hoop dressed as a fag
-people that like Lupe Fiasco
-spacer earrings
-victoria beckham's face in every picture
-girls that have the Sex & The City facebook application. Yes, you are just like Carrie because you have a face that looks like a foot. Or, yes, you are Samantha because you are a huge slut and your vagina resembles the aftermath of a Las Vegas casino being imploded.
-Congressional hearings on sports. I will be 65 and unable to collect on Social Security that would be coming out of my paycheck if I had a job right now. Instead, we get to watch Henry Waxman (who looks as if Hitler had a love child with a golpher) grill the Rocket no homo.
-Mexicans
-Haha just kidding.
-Guys that post on my ex-girlfriends facebook wall.
-The time it takes to ask someone at the school of the guy who posted on her wall to log into facebook, check this dude's profile out and see why the fuck he has to write on my ex-girlfriends wall.
-Seriously. He fucking threw the ball! How gay.
-I hate Julia Roberts.
-But I hate this most of all.
-I hate that I love you so, Rihanna. But her forehead looks like a tanned speed bump.
-I hate Marissa Miller. Have you ever seen a girl that's so hot you cant even look. Primarily because you know you will never get her (I can't emphasize) but also because you are mad that God made some girl so hot that if she killed your parents and then wore a cape made out of your father's backskin, you would still probably have sex with her.
-I hate that most DVDs are shot in that widescreen letterbox format. Everytime a DVD is like that I say it sucks and my friends are like "no its cool thats for better quality. Fuck that. If I wanted to see mostly black on the TV screen, I'd squint for 90 minutes.
-faux hawks. I hate faux hawks.
-weirdos that have huge headphones attached to their iPods. Its like using a Magnum for your needle dick.
-Standing in elevators. I never know what to do, especially when there are like 8 other people and 2 dogs in there. I can't check my phone because there is no service. And usually half way down my junk starts to itch and even if i wanted to do the wiggle hip adjust, I don't have enough room to do it without doing things that would look like I could be arrested for in the state of Georgia.
Posted byDa Great White Hype at 1:42 AM
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